My bra fight

Shopping for clothes is hard.  Especially when you are larger than you would like to be, or “should” be based on science & such.

I’m going to share something that many of you may not have even thought of sharing.  You may be asking how I can be so open with this knowing that people I work with may read.  I hope my experiences and my struggles show that you’re not alone.

I recently broke the under-wire in my bra. Sitting at work one day I realized I was having an awful fight with my bra and one side was being less than cooperative.  Discovering this news I figured I’d spend the afternoon at a retailer looking for a bra or two.

Let me just start by saying who the heck decided that women needed so MANY bras?  It’s a little crazy and overwhelming walking in to a store to look for a simple, tasteful, cute bra. 

I found a few that I think might fit me and take them in to the dressing room to try them on….

Yeah…  Nope!

What I immediately realized was my bra was old & out of shape and a size too small. So much for picking out the same size as I was wearing.  My next thought was “OMG!! I have back boobs!” This is very discouraging for me.  (between that and having cankles.)  I got dressed again and put the bras on the return rack and went in search of some closer to the right size.  (Which is discouraging because it’s “bigger”.)

I turn the corner from the “memere bra” section and find a whole section I missed.  Some more suited towards more “voluptuous” women.  I pull a few of these and go back to try them on. And still…..

back image of me
notice the rolls on my back & above my elbows.
I weigh less here than I do now. (c. 2011)

NOTHING FITS!! *insert curse words here*

I spent about an hour just searching for a bra.  I couldn’t find anything I liked that felt right that wasn’t gawd awful ugly as heck.

I’m not much of a girly girl, but I still like to feel pretty in my bras.  Yes functional too.

I walked out of the changing rooms without a bra to buy and went shopping for a shirt instead. I ended up cutting a slit in my bra to push the under-wire out of. Not the first time I’ve done this to a bra.  It will work for now.  I only have 2 bras.

This experience has motivated me.  I don’t want to be fat.  I don’t want to be winded trying to walk up the stairs at work.  I don’t want to squeeze my self in to a ride or whatever.  I feel a little helpless, angry at myself, and discouraged.

Side view taken in January of 2011.
I’m heavier now.
Front view of me
Front view. When I started my plan before acceptance into ME FIRST. 2011

Over the past month I put on ten pounds. The conclusion was due to stress.  The stress of possibly not getting paid in July.  Now that, that is settled, with in a week I dropped three (3) pounds and haven’t done anything different.  It’s amazing what stress will do to you, even if you don’t realize it right away.

So what am I going to do about this back boob issue?

Good question.

Get my ass MOVING!!!

I’m such a slacker when it comes to the fitness side of things.  It is my BIGGEST obstacle. I get everything else.  What is your biggest obstacle?

I read The Anti-Jared on Facebook & his webpage and he discusses Non-Scale Victories (NSV).  I’m going to be looking for these little victories instead of just watching the scale or the measurements.

What are your Non-Scale Victories?

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